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September 18, 2008

"always nlng me nsasaktan!!!!ngtitiwala me pro always nlng ako umiiyak..anu ba dpat ko n gwn?buti p c mickey(my shitzu dog)lging nsa tbi ko he loves me very much...Pro ung taong mhal ko..i dont understand him...Is it true b tlga that men are poligamUS?MEANING hndi sla pwede mg stick s isa?!!!!its unfair"

I got this topic from PINOY group of FRIENDSTER...and here's my answer for her ..

LOVING YOURSELF FIRSTblogger-emoticon.blogspot.com

When we feel hurt by what we think is "love", it is because we are looking to others to validate our own self worth. When we feel unworthy of love, it is difficult for others to love us the way we think we should be loved. And when we hang on to unsatisfying love just because we feel a desperate need to be loved, we leave ourselves open to heartbreak and disappointment. How can others make us feel loved when we don't love ourselves first?

The greatest act of love is to love ourselves first. It is in loving ourselves unconditionally that we set a standard for how we want to be loved by others. Do you love yourself enough to demand the love you deserve from friends and partners? Do you love yourself enough to receive the love you deserve?

Now, don't get me wrong here. I know this "loving yourself" thing presents a challenge for most of us. During our lives we have internalized many beliefs and patterns of self-sacrifice that discourage unconditional love from finding us.

I can attest to the power of these beliefs. Out of a fear of getting hurt, I used to see myself as the Stone Queen living in the Castle of Anti-Love. If anyone tried to love me, they had to swim across a moat filled with monsters (no drawbridge here), and then they had to bust through the portcullis while my guards poured boiling oil on them. Then, if they actually made it that far, my pursuer would then have to run down an alley filled with flying arrows to make it to the tower where they would find me, the Stone Queen, glaring at them with scorn. Their next challenge would then be figuring out how to bring the Stone Queen back to life. Have you ever locked yourself away from love like this? Many people do.

Needless to say, when people failed to enter my Anti-Love castle I saw that failure as proof, once again, that I was fundamentally unlovable. I wonder sometimes how many people gave up trying to enter my castle. How many times did I turn away real love while I sat feeling so sorry for myself? Have you ever done this in your life? Is there ANYONE on this planet who hasn't done this at one time or another?

3 comments:

MarcoPaolo said...

WoW! Love...Love...Love... When you love, expect that you will also get hurt. Mag-partner ang dalawang yan. pero magiging strong ka naman after all e... "learn how to give out love and to let it come in"... that's what we called- LIFE!

hOniE-GeLenE said...

aahah..love love na nnmn..:D

=Matsuo Masahiro= said...

love??...mejo disagree lng po ako sa comment nun nsa taas na..."When you love, expect that you will also get hurt."...

pra kc sa akin..pagnagmahal ka wag mong asahan na masasakatan ka lng...dahil kung ganito ang gagawin mo mapipigilan mo lng ang sarili mo na ibigay ang 101% ng pagmamahal mo...

life is a tough battle...ang mahalaga enjoy mo ang moment...no hesitations..masaktan na ang masaktan...after all journey nmn yan hindi destinations...:)